Up until Friday morning I wasn't sure what I was going to blog about, but after my third night in a row of getting very little to no sleep, it hit me. Or should I say, it slowly creeped into my fog shrouded brain, wrapped its clammy tendrils around me and stared into my eyes with an evil laugh as the energy slowly drained from my body.
Insomnia.
Now I'm not talking about only getting 3 - 4 hours of sleep one night instead of the usual 6 - 8 or so. I'm talking about lying there all night, staring up at the ceiling, knowing you want and need to sleep but not being able to for anything, no matter what. I'm talking about feeling brain dead, incapable of rational thought, and knowing what it's like to be an actual living dead zombie the next day. In fact, as I'm typing this I am silently thanking the cyber gods for spell check, even though I have had to go back several times already to correct typos.
Growing up I never really had any issues, and could sleep anywhere and anytime I needed to. As I get older it's becoming more of an issue, and I'm sure the biggest problem is me. My lifestyle and dietary choices make insomnia almost a given. I have to realize that I'm not 20-something and bulletproof any more. Mountain Dew is -not- one of the four food groups, exercise and sunlight won't really kill me, and if you want to go to sleep and get up at a reasonable time, you have to go to bed at a reasonable time.
The longest I've ever gone without sleep was 100 hours straight, and that was intentional for the most part. My long-distance girlfriend was in town at the time and I didn't want to miss a single minute with her. That was about 15 years ago but I still remember it well. I don't remember much about the time I spent with her, but I will never forget the feeling of depriving my body for 4 days of something that it so desperately needed, and I hope none of you have ever felt it or ever will.
Do you have any stories relating to insomnia, good bad or otherwise, that you'd like to share? If you've ever suffered from it, did you find anything that helped?
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11 comments:
Krys,
First let me say that I know you and, YES, exercise and sunlight will kill you! He he.
I really feel for you. I've had sleepless nights and sleep deprivation is not a fun thing.
When my children were babies, I spent many nights dozing in 1-2 hour increments alternated with 2-3 hours of awake time. It was excruciating some nights, but at least I had a reason.
Lying there, staring at the ceiling, is so frustrating and it seems the more you tell yourself you need sleep, the more it evades you.
My problem is that I'm a thinker and my mind just can't turn off. I'll lie there thinking about something and then my mind takes me somewhere new and then somewhere new again, and then I try to figure out how I got from thinking about one thing to thinking about something that has absolutely nothing to do with my original thoughts. AAARRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!
I really hope you can get some sleep tonight. Maybe a big glass, or bottle, or red wine will help.
Sweet dreams,
SIS Bren
Hi Krys
I know how that zombie feeling feels. I've been there many times. Like Bren, I just can't seem to turn my mind off. Too many things to think about doing the next day. When I go through a couple of sleepness nights I drink a couple glasses of wine to help make me sleepy. Some times it works, other times it doesn't. But the wine sure tatses good.
Oh boy, Krys, can I relate to this post!
My husband calls me 'Vampire', because I stay up almost all night sometimes. Lately, it's pretty often. Usually to write, blog, network, etc. But not always. I know I never get enough sleep. Not sure why my body doesn't want to calm down and catch some sweet winks. But, looking at it on the bright side, at least I get more things done!
Can't say I've ever stayed up four days straight without ANY sleep, though. Your old girlfriend must've been a humdinger, lol.
Brenda - You're a thinker? Who knew??? LOL
Seriously though, if I had been more awake when I wrote this I would have realized that probably every mother who replied to this would have had experiences with insomnia, it -definitely- comes with that territory!
I know exactly what you mean about your mind. I can be physically tired to the point of almost falling asleep but if my mind latches onto something it's over.
BJ,
I see active minds run in the family =0) Of course they do, or I wouldn't be here now!
I used to be in the habit of an occasional glass of wine but for some reason have gotten away from it. Perhaps it's time to revisit that old friend. I've also tried a few herbal remedies with some success. Valerian is awful stuff thought!
Alyson,
Alright! a fellow creature of the night! We gotta stick together, you know.....I know of a few others but I'm protecting their identities *winks at Bren*
I don't think I'd mind staying up so much if I could accomplish something creative while I was awake. I've tried, believe me, but it's not pretty. The old girlfriend at the time was something, all right, and she lived all the way out on the west coast so I decided to take advantage of the time we had while she was here.
Sorry to hear about your insomnia, Krys. I get it every so often. These days I'm especially prone to it when I'm on a tense deadline. My mind won't stop churning and I end up tossing and turning into the wee hours. Not fun.
When I was a young teen, I remember having insomnia a lot. I used to clean the house and watch back-to-back late movies. Now I just lay in bed praying for sleep. ;)
I'm stunned you were once awake for 100 hours. Wow. Actually, my husband recently told me a funny story about a time he had to stay awake 72 hours. I can't imagine!
I'd suggest a glass of warm milk, but my sisters' reccomendation of wine sounds more pleasurable!
SIS Beth
Beth,
Just the thought of insomnia plus having to be creative on a regular basis plus deadlines...Make it stop!
I can't imagine having to be awake for 72 hours straight being funny, but I'm sure somehow it was. Your husband is a trooper! Warm milk has worked for me a couple of times, but wine sounds much better. Depending on the wine, of course!
Krys, the story wasn't funny to him... at the time... Only in hindsight. :)
As for wine, I vote for Merlot!
SIS Beth
I rarely have trouble sleeping. More often than not, I actually have trouble staying awake. I can't imagine staying awake for 24 hours, let alone 72 or 100. The key is never to miss your window. When you start to feel tired, unless there is something incredibly pressing, go lay in bed and close your eyes. But if you miss that window, it'll be awhile before another opens.
SIS Barb aka Elle J Rossi
Elle,
Very insightful and so true. If you don't listen to your body you'll pay for it sooner or later, or both.
Beth - Sorry it wasn't funny at the time but it's good that he can laugh about it now. Merlot works just fine, or even a good Cabernet.
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